count the stars. dishes and the '70s [24 Dec 2006|09:30pm] [ mood | chipper ] After the heavy Christmas eve dinner, gift opening and chocolate fountain celebrations the women (Lauren's mother and aunt) and the kids (Lauren, me, her younger male cousins) gathered in the kitchen. Kevin decided to put a '70s hits CD in the stereo. It wasn't until we all stood there yelling "Bye, bye Miss American Pie/Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry" and discussing "the day the music died" while wiping counters and drying dishes did I realize that it was better than any Christmas music we could have been listening to. I wouldn't have chosen to do anything else.

count the stars. lily and her family with bubble wrap [23 Dec 2006|06:30pm] [ mood | pleasant ] Lily opened the door for me and picked up a squat package that sat on the step. Her father opened it and called us in to see the various gourmet foodstuffs that someone had sent as a gift. Lily's sister Chelsea ignored the jars and instead grabbed for the giant bubble wrap that was lying around. Her parents watched and laughed as we spent the better part of thirty minutes dramatically punching each other to the soundtrack of loud bubble pops. We were completely unabashed about how giddily childish we were acting.

count the stars. the airport [22 Dec 2006|11:20pm] [ mood | calm ] I drove Tony and his boss to LAX despite the fact that their plane was scheduled to depart 10 minutes after I dropped them off, at my insistence, to try to catch a later flight. Blocked in the traffic of the terminals I spotted a woman ecstatically grabbing several children and smothering them in kisses. It was so simple and so full, and it lessened the stresses of driving during holiday traffic just that much.

count the stars. yusuf and cookies [21 Dec 2006|12:20pm] [ mood | inspired ] Having no more tests to worry me, I sat down at Lauren's kitchen table with some buttery Macadamian nut shortbread cookies and the Calendar Weekend of the Times. I spotted a brief announcement for a broadcast of a Yusuf interview and performance on KCRW. I eagerly waited for 11:15 and tuned the radio from 89.3 (NPR station of choice) to 89.9. For the next 45 minutes or so I listened to Cat Stevens' soothingly warm voice, from singing his heartbreaking new "In the End" to the classic "Peace Train". My heart seized when he described the first time he'd picked up a guitar in almost twenty years--he said his fingers felt like they were home.

count the stars. philosophy study group [20 Dec 2006|05:30pm] [ mood | fond ] I got to the Sugar Shack around 1 p.m. and decided to check my e-mail (also known as procrastinating) before I began studying for my philosophy final. There was a message from one of my final group partners, inviting me to a study session. I hightailed over there and spent an intense hour reviewing and quizzing with some classmates, without which I would certainly have failed the test. It was at once relaxing and invigorating. It was nice to be included.

count the stars. not it! [19 Dec 2006|10:20pm] [ mood | good. ] We were supposed to head to the Grove to watch Apocalypto but ended up lounging around (watching Return of the King, which I thoroughly enjoyed) and trying to decide where to eat. Surprisingly Dan sat with us, going out to the market with Ashley and coming back with pomegranates and clementines. In the middle of eating a pomegranate he got a call (small mystery who) and disappeared into his bedroom for a substantial amount of time. I thought he was just going to stay there for the night (it being close to 1 a.m.--the time listed is really about when we arrived at Tony's) but he came out and we convinced him to drive us to the Kettle. I sat in the front with him while Justin (back from Chapman), Tony, Ashley and Lauren squished in the back, despite protests from Tony about my argument that smallest gets shotgun. It was strange being next to him again, and I felt torn. Smelling his cologne also didn't help. It stirred a lot of emotions in me all over again. The best part of the night was probably the ongoing and ever-worsening proclamation of "not it" whenever responsibility arises. Accompanying nose-touching is a must.

count the stars. ashley cartalk [17 Dec 2006|11:50pm] [ mood | nostalgic ] Ashley came over to Lauren's and at the peril of her father overhearing us, sat in her car to have a long-anticipated cartalk conversation, which covers everything from relationships to politics to living conditions. Since she's been in Boston we haven't had the chance to do this, and I remembered all the times we'd sat in our respective cars and done this in the past. It was comforting, and relieving. (this song reminds me of swings and sunlight in trees)

count the stars. the red light and the red sweaters [16 Dec 2006|11:50pm] [ mood | pretty damn hot ] On the way to the market (for the inaugural party) my sister and I witnessed a three-car Chinese fire drill with elderly participants! We were at a red light, trying to gauge whether we could fit in the gap between a car stopped and a parked car to turn right when the door to the stopped car opened. Then the other doors opened...then doors to the cars in front of that opened...and a dozen-odd older citizens bumbled out, all wearing some type of red holiday sweater and laughing delightedly, switching cars and seats. It was chaotic and a joy to watch.

count the stars. secret dinner invitation [15 Dec 2006|03:40pm] [ mood | still still hot ] I received an e-mail from my paper's editor in chief regarding a secret holiday dinner to be held only with those of relative import to the production. My name was the first at the list and I felt grateful to be included with other venerable figures on campus.

count the stars. nothing [14 Dec 2006|11:40pm] [ mood | still hot ] I can't remember anything good about today. Maybe to some extent the empanadas we ate before we went to the show, but otherwise it was a generally terrible night, which blocked out the rest of the day.

count the stars. brownies and bea [13 Dec 2006|11:30pm] [ mood | hot/dry ] After my stimulating and wildly uncontained Vietnamese final I headed to Bea's house with a box of freshly baked brownies in hand. When I arrived she greeted me cordially and we talked until dinner was ready; she brought out three prepared plates for each of the three fresh salads already on the table. We sat with her husband and talked about this and that. When everything was cleared and we'd eaten a few brownies we wrapped various holiday gifts. Spending over four hours was even better than the less than two I had with her as a teacher.

count the stars. scott's girlfriend and the irises [12 Dec 2006|10:20pm] [ mood | poor ] It being Lauren's birthday we headed up to Glendale to meet Scott and Anne for dinner. We got out of the car so they could get in and Anne handed us each a bunch of irises, stems still wet from the vase. It was completely unexpected and I gave her a tight hug. Dinner at The Alcove, a cozy outdoor cafe, we all sat and discussed comic-con, facial hair and the simpsons. It was slightly chilly outside but the heat lamps and conversation kept us invigorated.

count the stars. grandma and sushi [11 Dec 2006|07:10pm] [ mood | calm ] For my birthday my mother took us to a nearby sushi restaurant. My grandmother, suspicious of the thought of raw fish, ate only what was cooked. The last dish, however, was a cube of tuna speared with a slice of fresh mango. My sister told her it was watermelon and my mother, realizing this was her one chance to get her mother to eat sushi, quickly agreed. We collapsed in giggles and my grandmother, bemused, picked up a piece. She took a bite and made a strange face, and all we could do was laugh. It doesn't really taste like watermelon.

count the stars. intimacy [10 Dec 2006|04:10pm] [ mood | jubilant ] I've been waiting and waiting for it and it finally happened. It was so beautiful; we were lying next to each other and then he leaned over and started to kiss my neck and I turned and met his lips with mine. He held me the way I've wanted, or needed, to be held. I felt so lucky.

count the stars. debussy and mars [09 Dec 2006|01:51pm] [ mood | melancholy ] I watched Baz Luhrmann's No. 5 (the film) several times, and today I found a scrolling score of Clair de lune created by Stephen Malinowski. He and his wife are musicians living around Berkeley, I suppose. In any case the video brought me to tears; its simplistic and yet layered tonal intricacies combine to create a heartbreaking sound, along with its almost synesthetic visual coupling. Also, at Wil Wheaton's blog I read an entry that manages to explain the minuscule role I feel humans play in the universe, and saw a stunning photo of a Martian sunset. Yes, I did change my desktop background. Also this was the night I went to see Nosferatu at the Getty. Lauren, Tony, his brother Matthew and Matthew's friend Max and I piled into the car and drove at a snail's crawl through bucket-pour rain to the Getty, which that late at night was empty--we got an entire tram car to ourselves! I'd never been to a silent movie, and the posh, hushed theatre with its grand stage and elderly accompanist made for an unforgettable show.

count the stars. this project [08 Dec 2006|12:30pm] [ mood | pleased ] I've realized that this project, as insignificant as it may be, has done a lot for me. I've come to analyze lesser details and notice what I haven't before, tried to see love and light in something that might ordinarily be overlooked. I'm grateful for the perspective that I've gained.

count the stars. going home [07 Dec 2006|11:34am] [ mood | bleary-eyed ] I finally managed to work everything out so I could go home last night; Dad picked me up and we headed up the hill. When we arrived I kicked into action, sorting out our laundry, starting loads and doing the dishes after I fed the turtles. I ended up going to sleep around 4 a.m. or so because I had to wait for all of the laundry to finish. When I finally did, though, I curled up on the couch with Sam, whom I've been missing for weeks. He nuzzled into my arm and slept peacefully with me; I covered him with my blanket and hugged him. It was so fulfilling to be with my dog again.

count the stars. sleeping close [06 Dec 2006|11:20am] [ mood | optimistic ] Continuing on through this morning, Lauren and I celebrated our long-anticipated 21st Amendment party, which commemorated the repeal of the Prohibition on Dec. 5 in 1933. We went to Tony's (Tuesdays be damned) and got cheerfully tipsy, in the end collapsing in a heap on Tony's floor to watch the lauded Champ vs. Champ, Chris among us and Joe on Tony's bed. Emboldened by the alcohol coursing through me, I (still cautiously) put my arm around Tony's waist while we all slowly drooped off. He put his hand over mine and I fell asleep with the comfort of a warm body near mine.

count the stars. a good day [05 Dec 2006|10:00pm] [ mood | heavy ] I didn't realize it until Lauren finally put it into words (and I'm glad she did): I had a good day. It wasn't particularly exciting or depressing, disappointing or new. It was just pleasant. We stood in the kitchen eating bread and she described her inexplicable enthusiasm upon waking that morning. I dropped her off at school and later we went to lunch with our friend Matt; he introduced us to a cheap and delicious Mexican restaurant around the corner from the Sugar Shack and we talked with him extensively. That really was the highlight of the day--he was so happy. Just genuinely good-natured. We felt better being around him.

count the stars. half nelson [04 Dec 2006|10:50pm] [ mood | driven ] I almost second-guessed myself for not submitting a bid for tickets to "The Illusionist" with Edward Norton and others present, but exiting the Arclight after seeing "Half Nelson", I don't think I've ever been more inspired by a new film. Not just by its cinematography and its acting, but its dialogue and its message and its realism. It is a startling masterpiece in so many ways, and the chance to talk with Ryan Gosling and Shareeka Epps made it more memorable. Quite possibly the best movie I've seen this year.

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